Embrace Change

Embrace Change
Copyright 2005 Lori Radun



Last Sunday I was sitting in on a class we conduct for
newcomers at our church. One of our pastors said, "If we
don't change, we aren't growing, and if we aren't growing,
we are dying". Isn't that so true? If you want your life
to remain status quo, then your best guarantee is to resist
change. However, if you want a better marriage, more life
balance, higher self-esteem, better behaved children, or
more quality friendships, then you need to embrace change.



So many of us focus on changing other people around us,
even though we know deep down this doesn't work. In fact,
there is so much resistance to change that a book was
written called Why Should I Be the First to Change? There
are many answers to this question. First, you will be
happier if you are continually growing and learning. You
can only be responsible for you. When you change, people
will follow. Lastly, by living your life to the fullest,
you contribute to making the world a better place to live.



But let's face it. Change is hard. We are creatures of
habit, and many of our behaviors were learned in childhood.
Maybe those behaviors served us at one time, but
eventually we will be called to change if we want some part
of our life to be different. As someone who has been
committed to personal growth and change for over 20 years,
let me share with you five essential ingredients I've
learned you must have to successfully make changes in your
life.



1. ACTION
You can read every self-help book, attend seminars, or talk
with people about how they've made changes, but unless you
actually take action, nothing is going to happen. Of
course gaining knowledge helps. However, it's only the
first step to change. Our mother's group at church
recently read a book called She's Gonna Blow. In that
book, there were hundreds of suggestions on how moms can
better manage anger with their children. If a mom is
dealing with frequent anger at her children, then she must
take some of the principles and actually apply them to her
life. Maybe it means she has to resolve anger from her
past, count to 10 before she responds, or reserve daily
relaxation time for herself. She must do something
different if she is going to conquer her anger issues.



2. FOCUS
To focus, you need a vision and a plan. How do you want
your life to be different and what is your plan to change
it? This is one thing I have learned from starting my own
business. I have a tendency to have a million (well, not
quite) ideas about what I want to do to grow my business.
I will start to work on one idea and then jump to the next,
and then on to something else. Pretty soon I am wondering
what exactly I am accomplishing. Is my business actually
growing or am I just doing a lot of tasks that don't
produce results? For every change you are trying to make,
pick two or three things you can do to support that change
and stick to them. Try those things for a substantial
period of time before you move on to something else.



3. DISCIPLINE
This is what will carry you through when the going gets
tough. Anyone can stick to change for a week or two. It
takes a disciplined mindset to make lasting change. You
have to be able to pick yourself up when you fall down,
brush yourself off, and try again. For two years, my older
son, Kai, played travel baseball. Then he encountered a
long hitting slump and he was no longer a superstar. His
dad and I kept telling him he needed to be practicing or
his hitting would not improve. It took two years of
crushing disappointment from not making the travel team for
Kai to learn discipline. He now faithfully practices his
hitting at least five times per week. It totally comes
from him and his desire to succeed. His discipline has
developed a lifestyle change for him that has tremendously
improved his hitting and his confidence.



4. COURAGE
The number one reason we resist change is fear. Sometimes
it can be scary to change. It is much more comfortable to
remain status quo. It is normal to feel fear, but yet it
is so crippling. To have courage is to not feel fear, but
to push through the fear. I have always had a dream of
singing on the music team at church. Singing on our church
music team meant I had to go through an extensive and
frightening audition. I could have easily sat on the
sidelines and never taken that risk. Instead, I mustered
the courage to try out. It was one of the most nerve
wrecking experiences I've had. Even though I didn't make
the team, I learned something about myself. I am capable
of conquering fear, and I lived to tell about it.



5. SUPPORT
Change requires supportive people in your life. You need
people who believe in you and who will encourage you on
your journey. Sometimes you need someone to hold you
accountable for what you say you're going to do. You need
friends and family members that won't let you give up. You
need love and understanding when you are struggling.
Surround yourself with loving and helpful people, and put
God at the center of your life. Some changes are so
difficult, but all things are possible with God.Lori Radun, CEC - Certified Life Coach for moms. Lori
writes a FREE monthly ezine for moms who want coaching and
encouragement on living peaceful, balanced and fulfilling
lives. To subscribe, go to
http://www.true2youlifecoaching.com


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